The Devil in Plain Sight.
The promise came undone, the Devil lied and is long gone. Her presence, however, still lingers here, following me everywhere I go. Peaks through triple locked doors and the tunnels inside my brain. My eyes roll every time I hear her name but not in the way they do when you moan it. I'm deprived of sleep and her scent. I keep counting down the days when the illusions become my reality mixed with a different kind of daydream than the one I've been living in for the past few weeks.
Is she still the Devil I know? Has she changed her ways for the worse? What is it gonna feel like? Is there anything left for us? How will her touch feel like? Will she want to touch me? Is she happy to see me? Is it over? Is there still a hope? Am I going insane?
Sucked the life right out of me and I'm hanging off of the thrills she occasionally gives me. Because I love it, I can't deny. A delussional romantic with exceptionally high stardards for everyone except that one favorite sin of mine. Feels like a game and she's the opponent but also my only teammate and her role keeps changing constantly. I Can't stand the thought of her being happy with another psycho but myself, and I know damn well she could never fall for a sane one. Cause she's just as fucked up as I am in her own distorted way.
I want to wrap my hands around her neck past the point of sexual pleasure until the moment my killer instict kicks in and takes her life. I don't want her existing without me. Her ghost will haunt me for the rest of my existence but at least she'll be with me for an eternity. As I spend my hours overthinking shit, I find and lose myself into hallucinations only to come to the realization that maybe she's changed my brain chemistry so much so that I've become the devil.
Athina, x.
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